The Hobbit 30 Day Challenge: IN LESS THAN THIRTY DAYS!!! ****PART THREE****
for parts one and two: see here
a lot of things made me giggle. let’s see… okay the whole beginning, for one thing. Gandalf just strolls up to Bilbo like, “‘good morning’ huh? not for long!” and Bilbo’s like “HOSHIT IT’S GANDALF OMG WHAT DO I DO? UMMMMM YOU’RE INVITED TO TEA TOMORROW! :runs away:” and he forgets all about it and then all the dwarves show up one by one and two by two and he’s all like “WTF OMG WHO ARE ALL THESE BEARDYFACED PEOPLE?? WHAT IF I RUN OUT OF CAKES???!! GODDAMMIT” and he runs around fretting but they don’t give a fuck they just start singing songs to make fun of him (“chip the glasses and crack the plates!!”) and he just looks like a complete dingus.
and then there’s Tom, Bert and Bill! omg. “YOU CAN’T EXPECT PEOPLE TO WALK DOWN THROUGH HERE JUST TO GET ATE BY YOU TWO DICKS!” “WELL FUCK YOU!” “FUCK YOU TOO BERT!” “THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME BILL HUGGINS??? :punches face:” it’s hilarious.
and basically every snarky thing said by a dwarf.
i was nine years old. it was a class book in the fourth grade. by the time the class was finishing it, i was halfway through reading it over. i was utterly enchanted.
never laugh at live dragons.
seriously though? i was always a very shy, withdrawn, timid person. internalizing the story has no doubt helped me wriggle out of my shell over the years. asking myself ‘what would Bilbo do?’ more often wouldn’t be such a bad idea either. but hopefully i leave my comfy hobbit hole and have an adventure before *i’m* fifty years old.
I GUESS YOU JUST HAVE NO SENSE OF WONDER. MORE FANDOM FOR ME THEN.
that is quite possibly the least fair question so far.
:sigh: FINE… if i can only choose three… Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur.
i’m a lover, not a fighter! but honestly if it came to it a bow and arrow. or i’d just throw rocks.
well when you think of a dragon sitting on a big pile of treasure, you don’t usually think of it as a person you could have a conversation with. the fact that Smaug is intelligent adds another dimension to it. i remember how that surprised me as a girl. not saying i feel sorry for him, he’s a huge asshole for swooping in and killing everyone. but evil though he is, he is pretty magnificent too, and the image of a huge, terrible, splendid but horrifying monster, breathing his last flames as he falls into the lake, pierced by a single arrow… it’s haunting.
can i just be myself, except a hobbit? i’m practically a hobbit already anyway.